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Imagine for just a moment, that we are not alone. That this vast internet of stars, planets, rocks, dust, and light is just one of many. Each floating in the stillness of something altogether different; unknown. Something otherworldly and unnerving but home once to all. Recognizable, not by shape or touch, but instead by a feeling. Like you’ve been there before.
I often wonder what lies on the other side of the door; the other side of everything. If “here” exists then surely “there” must exist as well, and if that is true then what is in between? What is before? What is after? If it’s true that matter can not be created or destroyed then surely we must live on in some form or another.
There are those who believe that when this life is over, another begins. A paradise for the ambiguous “good” and fire for all the rest. Seems like a cop out to me. The archetype of crowd control on loan from the middle-ages. An invention created to shield the human mind from fear. Doubt. From the responsibility and weight of life and death; the weight of consciousness. After all, if you aren’t the one in control, you can’t be held accountable for a life left un-lived. Monotony matters not to those with second chances and even less when the grass is always greener on the other side.
Imagine, if you will, that this and the world of dreams are one in the same; two sides of the same coin. Imagine that they are two equally valid realities, forever bound to one another, and tied through the ether by the lens in your brain. Each one, entirely isolated from the other physically, but still affected by an echo contained there-in. We call it sleep, but this is just a word we use to describe something we are unable to comprehend. Unable to measure. Unable to predict. The switching of consciousness.
We need the universe to make sense; to be defined. Infinity is all together too much to process. Without borders, How can we find our way home? Does home exist? Without walls, How would we ever feel safe? Infinity is desolate. Infinity is worn. Infinity is frozen. And in a place like that, surely life can not exist. But maybe there is something else?
Maybe at the edge of the universe, where infinity meets eternity, the un-alive are looking down at us, just waiting for their turn to live. Maybe this place we call home is the paradise we seek and we are lucky to be here. Maybe by some mistake of evolution we are just the first form to be aware of it. Likely the only consciousness that has ever seen this place, perhaps the only that ever will. We know something is not quite right but we lack the ability to decipher why or to recognize that this physical plain was only ever meant to be a home for our bodies.
A transition between the here and there, the before and after, and all else in between. We’ve woken up too soon and find ourselves confused and frightened, desperately trying to make sense of something we were never meant to see. Desperately in search of meaning. Of purpose. Where life is just the quantum superposition of matter in macro and might only exist to serve as the fastest route to somewhere; Somewhere less crowded. Perhaps consciousness is just a light to guide us on our way toward complete entropy and the end of all things.
Many people spend their whole lives in search of answers, of meaning, or the reason behind our existence. But the more I learn, the less I believe there is one, at least none that you can find. I think it is up to us to manifest meaning from within ourselves. To smile in the face of endless infinity, knowing we are no different from it. Nothing stands still, nothing is static, and nothing is within your control, except you. So make the most of it. In the blink of an eye, it’s over, and when it is we say things like:
“They’ve gone to a better place.”
“They’ve gone home.”
“They’ve passed on.”
and maybe we are right. But it’s not heaven or hell or even a place at all, it’s just eternity passing through. On a voyage to find a home in everlast. A home that exists within….us.